Stop bullying start living
Stop bullying start living

What is bullying?

Bullying is not the same as falling out with friends and squabbles between friends – though these can and do cross the line sometimes. Bullying is an unprovoked, sustained campaign of aggression towards someone in order to hurt them for the sake of it.

Who gets bullied?

Nearly everyone is bullied at some time in their lives: by brothers and sisters, by neighbours or by other children. If you are being bullied, you may feel scared, vulnerable and quite alone but you owe it to yourself to try and sort out the situation so that the bullying stops.

Remember, no-one deserves to be bullied.

It is surprising that all sorts of people who are now very successful adults were bullied when they were young. It is encouraging to know that it is possible to succeed, in spite of being tormented at school. All of these well-known people were bullied in some way at school - Gok Wan, David & Victoria Beckham, Barack Obama, Rihanna, Jonathan Ross, Jamie Redknapp, Jessica Alba.

For some, the bullying went on for years; for others it was less frequent. All of them feel that bullying is wrong and that it was not their fault, but the fault of the bully looking for a victim.

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  • 69% of children in the UK report being bullied

  • 87% of parents report that their child had been bullied in the past 12 months

  • 20% report bullying others

  • 85% had witnessed bullying

  • (admirably, 82% of them tried to intervene)

How to spot bullying:

These are some ways children and young people have described bullying:

  • being called names

  • being put down or humiliated

  • being teased

  • being pushed or pulled about

  • having money and other possessions taken or messed about with

  • having rumours spread about you

  • being ignored and left out

  • being hit, kicked or physically hurt

  • being threatened or intimidated

Why am I being bullied?

People can be bullied for all sorts of reasons or no particular reason at all.

Sometimes people who bully others pick up on a small thing that makes someone stand out and they use it to hurt them. This might be the way someone looks, the things they like doing or even what kinds of clothes they wear.

Everyone is different, and it’s these differences that make people who they are. If you are being bullied in person or online, then you might think that it's your fault - it isn't.

What can I do if I'm being bullied?

  • Tell a friend

Your mates can support you, even if you’re not ready to talk about it in detail.

  • Tell a parent or guardian

They should be there for you, even if you’re not ready to take it to your teachers.

  • Tell a teacher
The teachers in your school have a duty to look after you. Ask about the anti-bullying policy at your school.
  • Find a way to stay safe at school

No-one should be too scared to go into school. You have a right to be there. Stay away from your bullies and stay in a group of friends when you don’t feel safe.

  • Ask your friends to look out for you

Your friends can be there for you, even if you don’t want to talk about the details to them. They can support you to tell someone who could help make it stop.

  • Don’t fight back

You could get in trouble or get hurt if you fight back against bullies. There’s no shame in not fighting back.

  • Don’t go along with what they want

Going along with what bullies want will give them the message that bullying is working.

  • Find out about your school’s anti-bullying policy

It’s good to know what your school has promised to do in the event of bullying. There might be something in the policy that could help you.

  • Keep a record of the bullying

Saving texts, emails and messages or writing down when someone has bullied you in person can be a useful way to keep track of what has happened and will help when you are ready to report the bullying.

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My friend is being bullied, what can I do?

  • Be there for your friend

Sometimes your friend might not want to talk, but being there to listen whenever they are ready is important.

  • Help take their mind off it

Hanging out, going for a walk, watching a film or playing games together are good ways to take someone’s mind off their problems for a little while.

  • Support your friend to help them speak out about bullying

It can be very daunting to open up to an adult about your problems. Going with a friend if they’re feeling nervous is a great way to support them.

  • Help your friend stay safe at school

Staying in a group is a good way to avoid bullies during break times.

Who can be a bully?

Anyone can be a bully. Some people may not realise that what they are doing is bullying and might think they are just teasing, but some people deliberately set out to bully someone and make them unhappy.

You can be bullied by other young people who live near you, or take part in activities outside of school with you, like sports or music. You can be bullied by people you have never met through your mobile phone or on the internet.

I am a bully, what can I do?

  • Admit to yourself that you are a bully

The first step in stopping bullying is admitting that what you are doing is hurting another person. When you know that, you can figure out how to stop.

  • Say sorry to the people you are bullying

It takes a great deal of courage to admit what you are doing is wrong, and apologise sincerely.

  • Think about what is making you bully someone

Is there something happening in your life which is making you upset, frustrated or angry?

  • Find a new way to gain people’s respect

Find a way to gain people's genuine respect. This could be as simple as resolving to answer more questions in lessons. You could practise your favourite sport and become fitter or work on a talent, like singing, dance or drawing.

I am being bullied out of school, what can I do?

If the bullying is happening on your way to or from school there are things you can do to stop this:

• Plan a different route to school which avoids the areas it happens

• Keep to well lit and busy areas to avoid being alone at any time

• Take a safety alarm with you – they are not expensive and create a loud noise which can attract help and put bullies off

• Walk with friends, or older brothers and sisters if possible

• If you are being bullied on a bus, sit downstairs rather than on the top deck and tell the driver about what is happening. If it’s a school bus then you can talk to your teacher – they are responsible for you while on a school bus and can make the bullying stop

• Keep a diary of what is happening with dates and times.

I am being bullied online, what can I do?

When a person or a group of people uses the internet, mobile phones, online games or any other kind of digital technology to threaten, tease, upset or humiliate someone else, this is called cyber bulling.

How can words hurt your feelings?

Words might not physically hurt you, but they can stay with you for a long time and make you feel bad. Using words and language to bully people is a form of emotional abuse.

If you are being called names, it can make you feel scared, lonely and sad. In extreme cases, being bullied might make some young people want to withdraw and may cause problems and family relationships.

Put your knowledge to the test with our zondle game made by:Kurtis,Isabelle and Jodie


zondle - games to support learning

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